What is failure? How to deal with failure in life?

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This is the last word anyone in the world would like to be associated with- Failure. Yes, failure in life stories hits hard,it can prove to be emotionally taxing and need not mention drain you of your valuable resources.

Who will not regret spending time and resources on something that doesn’t last and fail? Absolutely no one.

But the reality is that most of the time when we start something new or want to experiment on an idea, we make the mistake to idealize the situation and romanticize that idea, drifting away from the reality and facts. And this way of thinking oftentimes leads to failure.

To succeed is good but for that, you need to have the right perspective from the very beginning. It’s always better to remove the rose-coloured glasses and see things as they really are.

By taking smart risks and moving ahead with proper strategy and planning will definitely enhance your chance to succeed.

What is a Failure?

Oftentimes things don’t go the way they were initially planned. Anything can be a reason for this- You made a mistake, luck didn’t favour you, you had a setback, and the result, you failed.

No matter what the situation was but remember that it’s not always your fault. It is not required to always blame yourself for this.

To work things properly and get the expected results a lot of things and actions should fit in together and those ultimately get translated in success.

A smart way to deal with the undesirable outcomes is the safest bet you can take on experimenting further with the idea.Else, self-loathing will take you down to the negativity for the day or month.

You should, by all means, accept that you failed and manage it properly. If not managed properly it can further damage your potential or life.

The Definition & Meaning of Failure

By meaning failure mostly means lack of success or lack of growth. If someone lacks to do something that’s required to be done to succeed or there is no measurable growth even after a lot of time and effort. In simple words, the outcome doesn’t match the expectation.

Unfavorable outcomes are deemed a failure. You started something, it can be anything, like a new course, a new job, business, deal, relationship and upon starting it’s far from what you have thought or planned or you reached a dead end with no growth.

That’s a failure and it really sucks to get stuck in such situations.

How to Deal with Failure in Life?

Dealing with failure is not always easy. You need a plan and strategy in place to deal with your failure or else it will take a toll on your wellbeing.

To properly deal with failure, pay attention to these things surrounding the failure-

  • You should prepare yourself for the unfavourable outcomes.Before starting on anything important or making any major life decision prepare yourself for the worst-case scenario.

    Think about what can possibly go wrong and how will you deal with the situation afterward. Worst case scenarios should prepare you to protect your downside.

    It’s not about being fearful and not taking any action at all. In fact, this helps you in taking smart risks so, that you won’t be stuck with an unexpected failure and spend decades to crawl out of the mess.

  • Smart risks are advisable in place of undertaking stupid and uncalculated risks.
  • Stupid decisions are those risks that are not well thought of and if even successful they lead to a very small potential reward.

      Some examples of stupid decisions that can affect a person’s life badly-

    • Marrying a person or starting a business before you know them well.
    • A huge debt that you can’t easily pay to buy a big car or home.
    • Wasting your resources in playing the lottery, etc.
    • Anything that can affect your health or happiness badly and is not well thought is a stupid risk and should be avoided completely.

      But there are also some risks that are big and the rewards are also big. More sort of no pain no gain type of decisions.

    • Borrowing money to start a business on your perceived good idea.
    • Investing in something you don’t even understand.
    • Changing job without doing a proper background check on the new company.
    • Now, let’s have a look at what are the smart risks and why they are preferable over the above-mentioned types-

    • Before you start a new business have a few potential customers.
    • Develop kills that are rare and high in demand. So, you can get a job everywhere.
    • The benefit that comes with taking smart risks is that the potential damage is manageable. So, it’s important to honestly answer these few basic questions before you make any life-altering decision that can impose a long-term impact on you.

      What can go wrong? How much you are prepared to deal with the failure? What will be your regrets if you didn’t take this risk?

      Take the initiatives and make big decisions related to career and life in general. But it’s important to take calculated risks.

      Unwise decisions and uncalculated risks can cause harm and in the same way, taking no risks is also not advisable. Some risks are important and must be taken.

  • The Hardest but most Important Decision to take is about when to Persist and when to Quit after a Failure.
  • Now, this is the tough thing to decide. And after facing a setback you need to reevaluate on how much resources you have left and the potential chances you can still take.

    Investing money is easier but the chances that you are going to make more money in short duration is quite slim. To make the right decision on whether you should quit or persist you need to be very honest in making few assessments.

    Check if you are lacking passion and lost interest. If you are no more serious about continuing. Have no money left and you are running out of time too.

    Another important thing to access is that how much experimentation is left. Is this merely a hobby or a serious business for you? No-one will pay for your hobbies.

  • How to Deal with the Emotional Suffering that Happens after a Failure.
  • This one is the toughest part, after any failure you have to deal with your own emotions. Suppressing your emotions is only going to backfire in the long run. This can later come back as sadness, depression, and anger.

    It’s wise to take time to grieve. Instead of taking immediate action you should practice self-care. Coping with failure is never easy. Some people are more emotionally resilient than others. But more or less failure impacts every person.

    See things as they are and practice constant reassurance. It will take time as you go through the cycle of shock, denial, frustration, depression, experiment, decision, and then integration.

    Failure is a process that has its own ups and downs. Usually, it will take months to deal with the sadness. Practice self-love as failure is already hard enough. Be gentle towards yourself.

    To speed up your emotional recovery process you should be compassionate towards yourself. The next thing you should be cautious about is not running back to the situation you were in before you took the risk.

    It might feel safer but it’s not a good idea. You took the risk and opted for the change because you wanted to find a better position for yourself. Even you have failed it’s your responsibility to find it instead of going back to your previous life.

  • Useful tactics to make sure your mind doesn’t go crazy when dealing with tough situations.
  • Not only your emotional mind but your rational mind is also impacted by the failure. Don’t overthink the situation and get trapped in it for long. Self-pity will also not help.

    Try to not over analyze your situation. By doing all this and being stuck in it for long will only lead to the wastage of more time and resources.

    Instead of doing all this you should clearly evaluate what important lesson you learned from this experience. And after this start focusing your thinking on making strategies for your future.

  • Preparing a Plan to Get Yourself Out of the Failure.
  • After doing an honest assessment of your situation you will need a step-by-step action plan to act immediately.
    Try to see the situation as clearly as possible including the bright spots. There’s no 100% failure.

    Every situation however bad it might initially seem offers some hope and lesson for the future. The more clearly you will be able to see, the better you will be able to plan ahead.

    Re-access your resources and the emotional enthusiasm you have left to continue. Carefully script your next moves and gain a clear understanding of how much resources you will require.

    Measure your progress and reward yourself for all the small wins. If after doing so much experimentation you don’t see any measurable success then quit. Following these steps will help you in overcoming failure.

How to Overcome a Fear of Failure?

For some people overcoming the fear of failure is not easy. The reason mostly stems in lack of necessary self-esteem. If you have faced failure before then it’s not uncommon that you might develop a fear of failure in starting something new.

Most of the time this fear can be ruled out. Be clear about your goals and develop self-esteem. You might need to constantly reassure yourself that your fear is based on the previous experiences and unless you take some calculated risks there is no way to find out success in life.

In the End

Success stories can help you dream bigger and bolder but failure stories failure stories help you when the going gets tough and give you the courage to survive the setbacks.

In the words of C. S.Lewis, “Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.”

Everyone faces setbacks in life and it’s important to deal with your fears and failures properly to come out of it and it’s required to be successful in your next ventures.

Learn your lessons and keep taking smart measured risks in life.

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